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2003-12-10

Everyday it's a struggle to keep my strength in tact, to not allow my curiousities to wander into territory I'm still not ready to deal with. So much of my energy is spent not looking and not thinking because I have to really work at itómy will power isn't as strong as I would have hoped.

If there is only one thing I know about myself, it's that I am strong. I catch myself mid-fall and brush the dirt from my jeans so I can stand taller than I ever have. In the end I'm confident and love who I am. In the end I believe in everything I do and have faith in all the rest.

The most important thing, I've realized, is to know that I'm brilliant in every way; to love myself without doubt or comparison.

Some day I will make a list of all the things I love about myself and my life in an effort to heal enough to let others in. Some day everything will make sense and be right, even if just for a moment. It'll happen.


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